ROKER RAMBLE!
Your weekly satirical roundup of the crazy world of football, brought to you by Roker Report's very own John Crocker.
Roker Ramble: The Premier League relegation battle heats up...
We’re getting into squeaky bum territory as the season draws to a close. Gareth Bale says no to Wrexham, and it’s all change at South Shields...
Roker Ramble: It’s a Gary Lineker/BBC special!
This week has been dominated by one story, and one story alone. You don’t even need me to tell you what it is...
Roker Ramble: Manchester United end their long, long trophy drought!
It’s no more years of hurt for the Red Devils at Wembley this weekend, and it’s farewell to a commentary legend...
Roker Ramble: Colin W*nker is back!
The old boys are getting the band back together again (maybe), with Neil in at Huddersfield, and could Harry be next? Probably not, but we can dream...
On This Day (29 January 2008): New arrivals make a good first impression as Rade Prica scores!
Swedish striker Rade Prica made the headlines with his performance, but he wasn’t the only one starting out life at Sunderland on this day 15 years ago. Do you remember this game?
Roker Ramble: Bye-bye, Brucey! (He finished tenth, yanow...)
Sad times for fans of football dinosaurs as it’s bye bye Brucey, everything is going wrong at Crawley and there’s a non-Storey at Coventry... all in this week's Ramble!
Roker Ramble: Your weekly round up of non-Sunderland AFC news is right here!
It’s new year, same old broom for Posh, and Sol Campbell is very unhappy after being overlooked in the latest honours list...
Roker Ramble: “The Christmas Grinch is here!”
This week Charlton fans must be wondering what they’ve done to be on the naughty list. Plus: some bloke inserts himself into Argentina’s celebrations, and it’s not looking good for Sheffield United... Ian’s back with the Roker Ramble!
World Cup Ramble: The competition is underway... and absolutely nobody is looking forward to it!
THE WORLD CUP HAS STARTED! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaa...aaaa...aaaargh. Meh. Is it nearly time for Sunderland v Millwall yet?!
Roker Ramble: The ex-Newcastle forward that is scared of drag queens... and the return of STID!
Ian Bendelow is back with his look at the week that was - including the return of STID, and the man who is scared of drag queens, ex-Newcastle forward Gavin Peacock...
Lasses Roundtable: Would you be happy for Sunderland to play for the draw at Palace?
The Lasses have got Palace away on Sunday - they’re one of the favourites for the league. Is a point good enough on our visit to Saaf London?
Roker Ramble: Richard Keys and Mark Lawrenson feature in this week’s edition!
Actually it’s just a roundup of men complaining about not having things their own way. Well, that’s what you get for talking to GB News...
Women’s Championship Ramble: Mixed progress with heroes and villains on and off the pitch
Sunderland and others show that there’s more to improvement and success at this level than points on the board, but SUFC need to have a long hard look in the mirror!
Roker Ramble: A weekly roundup of your non-Sunderland AFC football news!
The in-tray this week includes UEFA making things up, Souness being Souness and the glowing backside of ASM...
Women’s Championship Ramble: A Sunday afternoon spent refreshing twitter, + some shock results!
Sunderland Women’s narrow loss to Bristol City will go down as a mere footnote in a dramatic weekend across the pyramid - Rich gives his take on the big stories
Roker Ramble: Is VAR alright if it’s annoying people you really don’t like?
Ian’s away on his jollies for the week so you’ve got Tom on the Ramble this week instead - and he’s chuntering on about various ways to take the p*ss, Hooters, and VAR’s ability to rattle Mags and Moyesy...
Roker Ramble: Poor Jack Ross gets the boot after 71 days in charge!
Spare a thought for our former manager, who’s left Dundee United only seven games into the season. Also, let’s all breathe a sigh of relief as the transfer window slams shut...
The Roker Ramble: David Moyes fancies himself as a bit of a comedian, does he?
This week David Moyes thinks he’d have us all in stitches, PSG and Bayern take it to new levels of boring, and Benin make their Ramble debut
Women’s Championship Ramble: Sass and slim margins as Sunderland’s rivals kick off!
An irreverent look at the weekend’s main talking points as the women’s second tier season got underway.
Roker Ramble: Cheesewashing on Tyneside, as the BBC make another ludicrous decision
The BBC make a brainless decision, the FA are getting serious about protecting clubs’ heritage, and the Mags are cheesewashing...
Roker Ramble: The Premier League is back! Are you excited? No? Thought not
It’s another season, and yet nothing will have changed. Also this week: Richard Keys scores a Ramble brace, and Southend don’t quite think through their latest sponsorship deal...
Roker Ramble: The silly season of nonsense news stories has finally arrived in Sunderland!
We all thought he’d gone and then he rears his head again. Yes, William Storey is back, this time with a new band of fake investors.
Roker Ramble: Well, I suppose it could be worse than having Lewis Hamilton as club owner...
We discuss Lewis Hamilton’s Uncle Terry, Luke Edwards biting back and Man Utd’s recent masterplan compared to the treatment of chicks... it’s time once again for the Roker Ramble.
Roker Ramble: Good footballers get angry this week, as the business end of the season arrives!
Cristiano Ronaldo takes his anger out on a young child, Atletico Madrid behave like small children and Kenny Shiels says something stupid...
Roker Ramble: At least there are no conspiracy theorists in Sunderland...
This week we have some bad news for Crawley Town, Bayern Munich misunderstand the substitute rule and Matt Le Tissier chooses a strange hill to die on...
Roker Ramble: Jeff Stelling is not foooooooookin’ leaving!
It’s been a funny old week in football. U-turns (not that one), new records and a chairman who’s pressed the nuclear button...
Roker Ramble: Your weekly round up of all non-Sunderland AFC news
Doesn’t it just warm the cockles when people you suspect have been up to "interesting" things over the years get a little back in return?
Roker Ramble: Sunderland are still rubbish, but it could be much worse, to be fair...
It’s all kicked off this week - with UEFA ignoring world events, Abramovich getting a pasting in parliament, and Michael Owen being a complete clot!
Roker Ramble: It’s a Sunderland AFC, KLD and Madrox special!
... because no one in football looks like bigger herberts this week than the club we all have the unfortunate privilege of supporting.
Roker Ramble: The nominations for football’s whopper of the week are in!
From cats to pricks to getting your kicks, there aren’t enough column inches to give justice to the actions of some absolute idiots in football this week. But we’ll try...
Roker Ramble: A week where Sunderland take the national stage - take note Sky Sports News!
Move aside politics, seven days is an even longer time in football. Wee Phillie undertakes a spot of trespass, ASM takes leave of his senses, and some welcome news for the women’s game...
Roker Ramble: The AFCON bursts into life in Cameroon, and Benitez bursts into flames at Everton
It’s been a funny old week in football. Spare a thought for Ivory Coast’s goalkeeper, referee Janny Sikazwe, Rafa Benitez and... Middlesbrough fans.