Who Are These Jobbers?
There is an extremely powerful vibe about going to Scunthorpe on a Tuesday night in November needing a victory to salvage your Leasing.com Trophy prospects. Did you ever really think we’d get to a situation like this?
You know when Tim Sherwood’s Aston Villa were 4-0 up at half time, did you, in your heart of hearts, think this day would ever come? Yeah, that game was bad but did you ever think we’d be here? When Jermain Defoe lashed home that winner against Chelsea, did you think that within three year we’d need a win over the current 88th worst team in the Football League to keep us in a competition designed for the bottom two divisions?
One man who certainly didn’t envisage this evening is Scunthorpe United manager Paul Hurst. He still has those dreams where he’s leading Shrewsbury Town to third in League One and is being touted to take over as Sunderland manager. He still sees himself as leading Ipswich Town to glory and not getting bodied into oblivion every week in the Championship.
Ol’Hursty might have actually thought he’d be a force for good at Scunthorpe and lead them out of the bottom tier at the first attempt. Well, Paul, my old friend, it’s not going well is it? Shafted towards the bottom of League Two, you have Bury to thank for going out of business so now that only one team suffers the ignominy of heading into the National League.
Come here, Hursty old pal, we can weep into each other’s arms while we remember the good times and focus very hard on anything but what is happening on the pitch.
What’s The Ground Like?
Hey fellas, if you really want to charm the ladies on Tinder simply drop in that at the time of construction in 1988, Scunthorpe’s Glanford Park was the first purpose-built Football League stadium to be built in England since 1955. If that doesn’t guarantee you a firm, hard right swipe, then I don’t know what will.
It’s now called the Sands Venue Stadium because lol.
How Do I Get There?
Driving to Scunthorpe on a Tuesday night in November, yeh, that’s what we want. Urgh, anyway take the A19 and A1(M) to junction 32A before joining the M62 heading east. Exit at junction 35 for the M18 and then follow this until the junction for the M180. Follow it all the way to junction 3 and take the M181 and at the roundabout exit for the A18 and Glanford Park is on your right.
There’s a car park at the ground priced at £3. If you get lost, plop DN15 8TD into your sat nav.
Scunthorpe railway station is a handy two miles away from the ground and while, as one Scunthorpe fan once informed me, “it’s all downhill” the best bet is getting a taxi from one of the pubs en route.
Where Can I Get The Sesh Started?
Soak in the cosmopolitan vibes of North Lincolnshire’s premier town by indulging in a few light ales prior to this feast of football. Now the popular Berkley Hotel (an actual Sam Smith’s Brewery hotel) is temporarily closed, it is pretty slim pickings around the ground for liquid refreshment.
You can combine your love of lager and breaded food at the Old Farmhouse on Doncaster Road while the Iron Bar at the ground itself also admits away supporters. If you feel compelled to make the long walk from Scunthorpe railway you can swing by the The Honest Lawyer on Oswald Road while the Royal Pub on Doncaster Road is an excellent pit stop en route to the ground.
Alas, Scunthorpe’s Peaky Blinders themed bar is shut on Tuesdays.
Is There Anything To Do Around Here?
It’s Scunthorpe on a Tuesday night.