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Roker Round-table: What present would you get for Chris Coleman this Christmas?

What gift would you give the gaffer this Christmas?

Chris Coleman & Kit Symons
Chronicle Live

Gav - @Gav1879

Picture the scene - it’s Christmas morning at the Coleman’s, and outside the snow is falling. Indoors the fire is cracking, and the stockings hanging above the mantle-piece are stuffed full with goodies - Santa’s been.

Dressed head to toe in his new crisp Christmas pajamas, Chrissy sprints down the stairs to see what ol’ Saint Nic has left for him while he’s been sleeping. He turns and looks through the door, and plonked right in front of him on the rug is a big box, decorated with paper and ribbons, and it’s rustling, moving side to side. He can hear whimpering - whatever is in there is excited and alive, waiting to be welcomed by his warm embrace.

Chrissy’s mind wanders.

What could it be?

It... couldn’t be, could it?

The companion that I’ve always longed for? I mean, they’re not just for Christmas...

Quickly he embraces the parcel and tears the paper to pieces, strip by strip. Hurriedly he snaps the tape. The whimpering continues and as he opens the flap, a fluffy head appears.

“SURPRISE GAFFER!”
TalkSPORT

Well... we can dream, right?


Connor Bromley - @ConnorBromley

I can imagine me and Chris enjoying nights in on the sofa, watching a good box set together. Now... which boxset to buy him?

I could get him ‘Breaking Bad’ - maybe it’d help to show him how important it is to work as a team? Maybe ‘Game of Thrones’ even, to show how the world is full of snakes and backstabbers?

Nah - Instead, I think I’ll opt for ‘Friday Night Lights’. Coach Taylor was capable of inspiring anyone into playing throwy football - so maybe he could teach Chris Coleman some new team talk methods? Plus it is just an epic TV series that I am sure we will love watching together.


Graham - @AsylumDoors

I’d buy him a human selection box full of the current Sunderland squad.

He could arrange them into best and worst like we all do at Christmas, starting with the likes of Galaxy and Mars Bars. He could focus on the best ones immediately, such as Bryan Oviedo and Tyias Browning, and put them near the top of his list of best of, whilst simultaneously disposing of the worst in the box - the Bounty bars of the team if you will, you know, the likes of Lee Cattermole and Billy Jones.

He could give them to close friends and family members that he didn’t particularly like. Alternatively, he could throw them into the fire.


Mark Carrick - @Carrima

Christmas is a wonderful time - a time to receive gifts that we never ask for and secretly wish we’d just had the money instead. Well, with the advent of the internet there’s all sorts of ways to recycle unwanted gifts.

So I’d get Coleman an eBay account. He could post Kone under a starting price of a pound and see who bids, or chuck Rodwell up on a ‘buy it now’ for 99p. He could even offer multiples, like Love and Mika as a combo. Who knows. At least this way, the money would end up in Coleman’s account and not Ellis Short’s pocket.

He might even find himself a bargain. Perhaps Pep or Jose have a few things sitting around they could do with getting rid of?

Sunderland v Southampton - Premier League
FOR SALE!
Photo by Ian MacNicol/Getty Images

Patrick Hollis - @PaddyHollis123

I think Chrissy Coleman would be happiest with several one-way tickets out of Sunderland for some of his squad - perhaps outer Mongolia?

I think that will help him to cleanse his mind. Maybe a chocolate orange too, because who doesn't love one of them in their stocking?


James Nickels - @JamesNickels

Transfer funds.