Dear Ellis Short,
Thank you so much for kindly agreeing to address your fellow fans last week.
It truly was a pleasure to hear your voice and to absorb your insights into the management of Sunderland AFC. It was quite a thrill.
The way you handled the questions was superb, you seemed so on top of your game. It was almost like you’d seen the questions in advance, or even written them.
I fully sympathise with how annoying it must be to see press speculation about your plans and intentions, especially when you have a principled rule of never speaking to the press or, through them, to your fellow fans.
How impertinent of people to try to guess your plans. How awful that rumours get around. I wonder how you could possibly avoid being put in that situation?
Perhaps you can tell is more about that when you next speak to us, say in 2020?
It was so great to hear that we’re still aiming for 7th in the Premier League and that in a bad year we might only make 10th or 12th.
It’s my failing, but I couldn’t quite work out how that tallies with our current situation, or “crisis”, as you so bravely described it.
Still, I expect your strategic mind is grinding through its gears even now with an answer to that conundrum.
Although some of your managerial appointments haven’t quite worked out – one or two could even be described as disastrous – there’s no reason to think that you won’t solve our problems now.
Experience of the last decade suggests that the club is safe in your hands and long may that continue.
In fact, the most cheering news was that you are not looking to sell up even though you’ve moved back to the US.
Rejoice, rejoice, your successful tenure as chairman of one of the Premier League’s top clubs continues. On with the masterplan!
I’ll let the last person in the Stadium of Light know to start preparing to turn off the lights.
Your fellow fans.