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Leaders & High Scorers
They were back on top last week and now Mackem Boys are consolidating their position. It was one up front, one at the back and one in the middle that gave Stu Howarth a high scoring total of 64 points - with Sergio Aguero, Theo Walcott and Gareth McAuley. The sweetener was having Aguero as captain, meaning his brace counted double for Stu. He leads Scott Daglish's My Little Kone by 10 points.
Another Aguero captaincy led to John Redpath becoming this week's high scorer, with Redpaverd bringing home 95 points. Aguero wasn't the only striker doing the business though - Charlie Austin and Christian Benteke also got a goal apiece, whilst Alexis Sanchez scored two from midfield. Even though the game has him down as a midfielder, Victor Moses marauded from his new found wing back position to score and McAuley was also in the Redpaverd ranks. It wasn't just goals for John though - clean sheets were vital too and they were earned by Lee Grant and Virgil van Dijk.
Down The Bottom
Since Moyes Red n White climbed off the foot of the table this week, a new team fell to the bottom of the pile. I can't decide if Clamiddlesbrough is an excellent pun or a really terrible one but, regardless, Antony Bunney's team have hopped into last place. G
iven Antony was hovering around the bottom, a weak score of 19 meant this was inevitable as he wasted his "All Out Attack" card. 5 points scored by Diego Costa were the only serious points for this team and Kyle Naughton being part of a Swansea defence that conceded 4 goals meant -1 points from him.
If you think that's bad though, wait until you hear about James Timm's lot. A measly 13 points was all Kone of Cheesy Chips brought in, a superb team name not being enough for him. Even though James had three Chelsea midfielders, Willian, Kante and Hazard, none of them did anything in their win over Spurs that scored them any fantasy points.
The front line was also blunt with Jermain Defoe being the highest scorer on 4 points and even that was doubled from 2, due to him being captain. I think James may have forgot to sort his team out this week though because Adam Lallana still occupied a position and that's not the kind of commitment we want to see.
The Roker Report Team
A much better week from the strongest Roker Reporter so far this season - Jim Holmes' Giroud - Sandstorm scored a massive 76 points and went up to 16th. Opting for Alexis Sanchez rather than Aguero as captain was key because the Chilean earned 28 points on his own. Gareth McAuley also added to proceedings and everyone else scoring fairly low didn't really matter since those three players had done enough.
All our applause goes to Dan Parker this week, he scored 60 points and shot up 32 places to 98th. Aguero and Benteke up front, Wilfried Zaha in the middle and Joel Matip in defence were the main protagonists of 50 Shades Of O’Shea’s climb, as Dan used his “All Out Attack” to good effect.
That leaves Jim and Dan as the only two of in the top 100 now, since FlyOnTheWingsOfLove fell 22 places to 102nd. A poor week for Micky Lough, with only one goalscorer in his team (Zlatan Ibrahimovic) and one clean sheet (Virgil van Dijk) but two assists from Dele Ali and Nemanja Matic stopped things from being too bad. The falling continued with our resident NewsWiper, James Henchard, with his team falling out of the top 100 after only just breaking into it. Blackended Roar Mass slid to 116th and saw captain Philippe Coutinho stretchered off early on. Joel Matip got a clean sheet and Aguero got involved up front but it was not a good week for a team that was beginning to make progress.
Just like James, I thought Coutinho would do a bit of a number on Sunderland so gave him the armband. If only I’d given the Champagne Papy Bodji captaincy to Aguero, Gareth McAuley or even Diego Costa. That would have seen me score above the average weekly score and I may not have moved down to 150th. We can finally find another team who had a good week in 169th though - Carl Purvis’ Crystal Phallus (fnar). Carl took a gamble, using his triple captaincy on Sergio Aguero and we all know how that turned out. It scored him 36 points, which was over half of his weekly earning. Further joy was attained through Southampton’s tight defence, with Van Dijk in defence and Fraser Forster in goal and former Saints man Theo Walcott’s goal against Bournemouth was a sweet earner as well.
Back to people who’ve had a crap week though and it’s Sunlun, managed by Tom Atkinson, who we find next, down in 237th. No goals from any of his players but there were clean sheets thanks to Van Dijk, Clyne and Forster. 40 points isn’t a bad weekly score considering the lack of goals, to be fair. A couple of scorers and Tom may have made some strides up the table. You could level similar criticism at Team Simon but they did manage to bag one goal through Christian Eriksen, at least. The goals dried up after that but Simon Fenton was another player to have Van Dijk at the back and Nacho Monreal’s assist was a nice top up too. They’re in 248th place.
Another player to have Aguero as Triple Captain - Gav’s Ice Cream Kone used that boost to make up for a poor outing last week and they moved up to 285th. No one else in Gav’s side really shone but it doesn’t matter so much when one player scores 36 on his own! Still bottom of the writers, but moving up 8 places to 292nd, is Steel Panthers. Karl Maguire went for Aguero as captain (writing this is really making me hate myself for not making Aguero MY captain), scored 10 through McAuley’s goal for WBA and got a lovely little assist from Costa.
Who To Pick This Week
Since a lot of us will be transferring out Philipe Coutinho, it’s all about getting good value from the money he gives you. If you want to get someone fairly cheap, so you can bank the remaining cash, you could pick up Gaston Ramirez for £5.3M. Playing at home to Hull, you’d expect Middlesbrough to get a goal or two and if Ramirez isn’t scoring, there’s a good chances he’s assisting.
If you want to go ahead and spent a little more though, you can think along similar lines and buy Hueng-Min Son for £7.2M. Totteham host Swansea, who just love conceding them goals, and like Ramirez, you’d expect Son to be involved in the creating of chances, at the very least.
With Coutinho looking like he’s going to be injured long term and Roberto Firmino being a doubt for the weekend, it might be wise to invest in the player who replaced Coutinho on Saturday. Divock Origi scored a very good goal against Sunderland and that will probably see him keep his place when Liverpool face Bournemouth at The Vitality Stadium. For a striker, he’s also quite cheap at £6.5M and if The Cherries continue their poor form, it’ll be a good afternoon for Origi.